As parents, we all hope to raise our kids to be responsible adults. We want them to be able to handle many of the problems they face and not run away from what’s required of them. We want them to be successful in their work and successful as they start their own families, and that’s going to make them develop a sense of responsibility. But how do you instill that in your children?

While each child is different, there are some common guidelines that will help you to create a sense of responsibility in your children.

Let Them Make Some Decisions

You always want to set limits for your children while they’re living with you, but you also want to help them develop their own decision-making skills. In order for them to be responsible, they have to learn how to make some decisions for themselves. So, you can look for opportunities throughout the day and the week where your kids can choose some things for themselves. This gives them a sense of empowerment and helps them to feel like they have some control in their life. Often, children fail to take responsibility because they don’t feel like they have any control over their lives. This isn’t true of every child, but if you’ve hit a brick wall and trying to teach your kids responsibility, try giving them a little empowerment in their decision making.

Assign Them Chores

How can children learn to be responsible if they never have anything to be responsible over? 

Kids will struggle to learn the value of a job well done if they are never given any jobs to do. Remember to start them off with small chores that they can handle and that they’re capable of doing. From there, you can give them more responsibilities and see how they handle those. Don’t overwhelm them with chores, but give them a chance to learn new skills with the chores you give them and make sure you show your appreciation for the work that they’re doing.

Tie Chores to Rewards

When you give your kids chores, it’s a good idea to show them the link between working hard and reward of some kind. This can teach them how to be good employees later on or how to work hard for themselves as they establish a business. What a lot of parents will do is tie the chores into allowance or other privileges. It doesn’t have to be a money reward. If they do their chores well, then you can allow them to have dessert, let them hang out with their friends, take them to the park or the library, or something else that shows them you appreciate the work that you’re doing. This helps to establish a sense of responsibility and show them that doing a good job is going to be appreciated by most people.

One way to show your appreciation for your children doing their chores is to do some of their chores for them once in a while. Or, you can hire a cleaning service to declutter your place or other parts of the house that your child is responsible for. This may be something you want to do periodically to show your kids that you really appreciate how responsible they are with their chores.

Let Them Have a Pet

Some kids need something that motivates them to be more responsible. There are few things that motivate them more to have a sense of responsibility and to put in effort to what they’re doing than when the life of a beloved pet is in their hands. You can allow your kids to have a pet and then assign them chores related to that pet care. You can give your kids the responsibility to feed the pet, check on its wellbeing, and clean them, depending on the kind of animal you’ve purchased for them. You want to keep an eye on the pet and make sure that your kids are doing a good job taking care of it, but you can leave a lot of the responsibility up to them. You might be surprised at the kind of maturity you see from your children when they have their own pet to take care of.

Give Them Big Kid Responsibilities

As your kids grow older, there are opportunities to give them greater responsibilities. Older kids may be allowed to drive the car periodically, run errands, stay overnight by friends, have an outing by themselves, ride their bike down the street, or other things that are age appropriate that you believe they can handle. Giving them these privileges or responsibilities can help them grow their own sense of responsibility. They can see that you’re giving them a little space and an opportunity to prove themselves, and most kids will want to make their parents proud and do a really good job.

Set Consequences and Follow Through

Teaching responsibility is also about teaching your kids that there are consequences for their actions. It isn’t just about reward but also about punishment when they fail to do their chores or fail to be responsible. Parents will punish their children in different ways, depending on the situation, the child, and the parenting technique. However, if you do set down a consequence for some sort of action, you do need to follow through on it. If you’re making empty threats, you will rob your children of their sense of responsibility. They will understand that there are no consequences for their actions, even if that’s not really true. By setting down consequences and following through on them, you teach your kids a valuable lesson about taking responsibility for what they do.

Summary

Your kids can be handful sometimes, but if you’re teaching them to be responsible, they can surprise you with what they’re capable of. The guidelines I’ve given you are just a few things you can try to instill a sense of responsibility in kids who may be struggling with this character trait.

 

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